Elkhart County, Indiana - Chapter 4, 1881 (part 3 of 3)

Earle belonged to a peculiar class of wits, whose phrases were quite natural and pithy. His vocabulary was singularly replete with obsolete and new words, his diction was melodramatic, and his whole style half legal, half journalistic. In connection with Judge Chamberlain's law ofliee, he contrived to render time subservient to his will at long intervals, and often turned the anxious client from thoughts of law to lighter occupation. A story or a phrase from him was only necessary to achieve this result; but his quaint humor almost got him into trouble once. It appears that in the absence of his huge principal, he was accustomed to call the ponderous Judge " Mahogany Face.'' Well, one evening the youth of Goshen gave a soiree in the large rooms above the judge's office, in the then new building at the corner of Main and Market streets. This jolly meeting Earle was determined to attend, and after his late office hours, dressed hurriedly, merely substituting slippers for the boots, and a fancy tie for the ordinary neck-wear. As there was no key for the oiEce door, "Washington placed his discarded boots and old tie in the nearest drawer, and without a thought of supper rushed up stairs to join in the dance. Meantime the Judge returned to the office to look over some legal documents, and to his horror found that the boots and tie of his clerk were stowed away in the very drawer wherein were the very documents which were presently to bear a judicial survey. Now, Chamberlain grew very mad, and without any ceremony whatever cast Earle's pedal and neck ornaments out the window, then hid the lamp and matches, and retired to a corner of the room, there to await his clerk's coming. Tired of the dance and perhaps anxious for supper the young Lothario, with a friend came in search of his boots ; a search that proved more perplexing the longer it continued. At length growing desperate and quite unaware of the old Judge's presence, he remarked, " I bet my life old Mahogany Face has been here." Continuing the search, and meeting with disappointment he was about retiring from the dark room, and said again to his friend: '' That cursed old Mahogany Face has surely been here." " Yes," roared a voice from the darkness; "old Mahogany Face has been here and consigned your boots with all the other d - d paraphernalia of your nonsense to the street, where your contemptible cheek may find them." It is absolutely unnecessary to state that Earle went home minus his boots. The thunder of the terrible old Judge pursued him in his flight.

"'Squire Rose was, on one occasion, appointed inspector of ballot dockets, and so far as the electors marked the Democratic nominee, performed his duty with a willingness and promptitude worthy of the most impartial 'Squire in the land. For such duty he enjoyed the confidence and respect of his party; but the "Whigs looked on him with a strangely peculiar eye of jealousy, and delicately hinted that in their very souls they believed 'Squire Eose would be guilty of any crime which would win a point for the success of the Democratic ticket. Their belief in this connection rested on a very firm foundation; for, as revealed in later days, when the 'Squire snatched up a docket, giving a vote to the "Whigs, hewoald presently crumple it to nothingness, and cast it away with unconcealed disdain,

The Witty Barrister And The Judge

In those gay. old times, even circuit judges did not remove themselves from ail indulgence in the converse, gossip and common-place proceedings of ordinary mortals. Of all the villages upon the face of this broad earth, Goshen was pre-eminent in rendering a warm welcome to visiting lawyers, and in friendly feeling for her own ; so that it may not appear strange to learii of the io7ia-jide existence of two dozen legal members within the limits of the village during a term of the Circuit Court. Judge Chamberlain was generally one of the number, and even his subsequent elevation to the position ot President Judge, could not alienate him from ancient friends, and old fellow-gossippers. One day, while moving his large body and soul down the village street, he met one of his many dear associates, and, as usual, stayed to converse upon any subject which might present itself. The " weather " and the crops " were exhausted, the question of metempsychosis was settled, every sublunary subject was considered, until at length the speakers entered upon purand simple gossip. Judge Chamberlain's first subject was Counsellor Harris, - a clever young lawyer, possessing a head full of brains supported by a short but agile body. The judge thundered against the clever little lawyer for some imaginary offense, and assured his friend that on meeting Han-is he should get not only a piece of the Judge's mind, but also the whole of it. He had not long to wait; the sprightly Ham's came tripping up the street, and halting for a moment rendered the usual salutation to his honor. His surprise can scarcely be imagined, when the huge Judge opened his capacious month, stretched his capacious jaw and roared in thunder tones: - "Harris, my opinion of you is very, very contemptible, sir." "Ho! ho! Judge," responded Harris; "your opinions are always contemptible, very contemptible indeed." Chamberlain's friend screamed rather than laughed, Chamberlain's walking cane made a hissing noise in its passage through the air, but it fell harmless, as the witty little lawyer disappeared round the nearest corner, leaving the ponderous Judge to dream over the retort cordiale, and make better dispositions for another and a more successful encounter with wit.

In the earlier years, when a truer friendship, a greater degree of geniality and a larger share of leisure were possessed by men, it was a very common practice to take advantage of every opportunity presenting itself for what the people termed " fun." Michigan and Indiana were far in advance of other States in their fondness for iunocent or practical jokes. The formei' State laid claim at that time to a collection of jovial chavacters from the Eastern States; while Indiana possessed a small population of industrious, honest and light-hearted toilers. iS^ow, it appears that one Dr. Brouse, a lecturer on the science of phrenology, visited Michigan; but finding the "boys " there possessed only rery few phrenological bumps, and a full knowledge of their own temperaments, the Doctor determined to come down into Indiana. He arrived at Goshen all right, and soon bad his glaring posters scattered throughout the village. Those posters created quite a lot of gossip with some little interest. Among the interested parties were members of the press, the legal and medical professions, and the mercantile community. Some of the wits thonght they could have " fun " with Dr. Brouse, and arranged that Lawj'er M. C. Dougherty be made the principal actor. Accordingly Dr. Brouse was introduced to Dougherty, who figured now as Professor Bnell, a phrenologist fi-om Cincinnati. After a short converse Brouse saw that nothing less than a union of interests with Prof. Buell could bring in money to his little treasury, and without any hesitation proposed a partnership with liim. Buell protested, saying it was not his purpose to oppose the Doctor, particularly since his posters were placarded through towD; but Brouse should have a partnership, and succeeded in carrying the proposal made to his verbose rival. The evening of the lecture arrived, the Doctor urged the Professor to give the first lecture, the audience cheered and called on him also, and to their repeated calls M. C. Dougherty himself had to respond. His lecture was comparatively good, and everything went as merry as a marriage bell until Dr. Brouse came forward. He seemed amazed at the enthusiasm created by Dougherty or Buell, and felt that, even with all his histrionic powers and his knowledge of the subject, the high enthusiasm created by the last speaker could not be upheld. This made him so nervous that liis attempt at a lecture failed w^ toiSo, and exposed him to a series of derisive cheers. He retired cursing tlie day that brought him to Goshen, and to a meeting with Professor Buell. The last named met him the following morning, examined his bumps, told him that he possessed " gullibility " in its highest form, and assured him that he was no other than Michael C. Dougherty, a Goshen lawyer!

Looking Foe Political Honors

The meetings of the legal fraternity of early days were meri-y beyond all conception. ]^ot all the gaiety of inodera times could compare with it. It was genuine mirth, ornamented at intervals with witticisms of variable character. The pitcher was an accompaniment, and though a few lawyers never seemed to notice its presence, the greater number paid it peculiar attention, and observed the ebb and flow of the mirth-inspiring liquid with a rare solicitude. On one of these occasions a political form was given to the proceedings. The lawyers mingled with their clients, and made the very air ring with the recital of their own political excellencies. Among them was a young advocate M'ho, partaking of the prevailing enthusiasm, dreamt of Congressional honors, and rose to address the electors of his adopted county. He said: -

" If you see fit to send me to Congress I will go to the best of my ability. [Cheers.] I believe I would like to go. [Renewed cheers.] In fact, I know I want to go. [Loud cheers.] I have heard tliat the salary is ample, and, as I have a small family, won't insist on its increase. [Glieers.] As I am fond of vindication, 1 want to vindicate myself. It has been hurled. at me like a thunderbolt that I am too young. In answer to this, I say first that I can't help it, and it is not my fault. Second, I am trying to grow older everyday. Third, I am succeeding. F'.'urth, I am afraid I will be much older than I am before I get to Congress. [Prolonged applause.]"

That young advocate has harvested the experiences of forty years. He looks back over the past with a feeling akin to sorrow, and thouiih he could not now contrive to make such a wild political speecii, he would desire nothing better than the return of the good old times when such rare addresses were not only tolerated but also applauded. He wishes in vain; those gay old times are gone never to return, nor will he be the last to wish; for other men of a coming race will look over the record of those past years, and wonder how mortals could be so admirably happy.

The Auditor And The Immigbant

An incident, whicli is not only characteristic in itself, but also shows the effect a first acquaintance with republican institutions, manners and customs has upon the emigrant from European flunkeyism, took place in 185i. Some time in that year, a man of fifty or sixty winters arrived in the county in his search for a refuge from the extortions and petty despotisms of Germany. One of his countrvmeu had occasion to visit the county seat to transact business connected with the purchase and transfer of some land, and took with him thither the German immigrant. In the rambles of the older settler through the county' offices, a short stay was made in Auditor Henliel's office. That official banded his rural visitors chairs, and as the day was cold, they gladly availed themselves of that comfort which a seat near the stove afforded. The Auditor answered some business interrogatories of the independent citizen, and then, seeing that the fire was burning low, went out for fuel, and returning presently, placed it in the stove. The immigrant looked upon the whole proceeding with a curious eye, and finally asked his friend when the Auditor would come. " "Why, here is the A.uditor," said the citizen. The surprise of old Heinrich can be barely imagined. He confessed that during all the time he sat before the office stove and looked upon all the little chores and office duties being performed by the genial Auditor, he felt that the master official had not 3'et arrived . Now ho could scarcely reconcile the manhood and democracy of the United States with the redtapeism, effeminacy and flunkeyism characteristic of German officialism known to the Teuton in the cradle of his race. Realizing the condition of a great and free ]3eople, lie in one moment imbibed the first principles of the Republic and pledged himself one, at least, of her people.

The Farmeu And The Lawyer

Recently a political discussion took place not a hundred miles from Elkhart, whereat a Democratic farmer and a Whig lawyer were the principal characters. The farmer came in from the harvest field after a pleasant day's work, clad in the habiliments of agricultural industry. He mounted the platform in the beautiful courtroom of Goshen, and with a natural simplicity referred to the party of which he was a member, won the hearts and ears of bis audience, and, following up his advantage, broke out into a terrible denunciation of the principles to be advocated b}^ the legal gentleman who was to follow. The lawyer, quite unprepared for such a formidable antagonist, became so disturbed that, in the excitement of the moment, he rose abruptly, addressed the electors as - "Gentlemen of the jury," and retired in comic confusion amidst the laughter and cheers of the people. His retreat was carried out with such pre- cipitancy that he forgot his exit from the court-house, and retiringto his residence to gain some repose, recognized himself next morning as the conquered la^vyer. However, after the lapse of a short ime an opportunity was p -esented wherein he could avenge the defeat and confusion of thar night. He met the farmer on debatable ground, came well prepared for the combat, and that son of toil never rose again from the verbose baitle-iield of political orators.

On another occasion a gentleman was forced to the rostrum, much against his will. -' I can't speak in public - never done such a thing in my life," said he, " but if anybody in the crowd will speak for me, I'll hold his hat."

The Profane Man And Judge Sample

la 1833, among many indictments for betting, illicit spirit-dealing and like oti'enses is the State vs. Leonard Stiison for unlawfully playing at and betting upon a certain unlawful game called Roulette, and winning from one Wm. Elaku the sum of 12^- cents. Stiison was ordered to pa}' one dollar and costs of conrt, and to remain under the paternal care of the county sheriff until such sum was paid.

In 1S3G S. C. Sample was appointed President Judge, but nothing of importance occurred to vary the monotonous character of law causes brought before the court during that j^ear. The year following, however, the associate jiulges passed judgment on an incorrigible blaspiiemer. They joined in an order that the prisoner should be given a pair of tongs, and placed on guard over a mouse-hole until he should capture the little animal, which now and then appeared to scan the countenances of the judges, or listen to the pleadings of counsel. The prisoner took up his position as directed, watched with eager industry', and was ultimately rewarded by getting a glimpse of the cautious little animal, now the object of his most anxious thoughts. The tongs were scientifically arranged, so that no opportunity of catching that mouse should be lost; the court cast sly glances at the prisoner, the people in the auditorium gave him all their attention, as they looked breathlessly on his ready attitude and expectant visage. The mouse at length appeared; the tongs closed with a twang, and the impenitent got 'em!" The court forgot dignity, the sheriff his duty, the bailiffs were actually weighed down with laughter at the ruffian's un conquer- able profanity, and itis very possible that, had not the court recovered sufficient gravity, and possessed suffioieat presence of mind, the first session of lS3o would be adjourned sine die. The merriment created by that prisoner did not subside suddenly. "With the exception of men actually engaged in the court all were in the streets, and under the effects of liberal libations of a liquor well known and appreciated by many thoughtless people formed up in imagination the unfortunate mouse, his captor, and even the court, iilling space with the sound of their boisterous laugh and exclamation.

Seven Citizens And The Long-Haieed Strangee

The present can never equal the past in its genial characteristics; yet at intervals some merriment is occasioned by the assumption of an extraordinary appearance of importance, at the jiands of some modern who takes a pleasure in making himself ridiculous.

Soon after dinner the other day seven politicians were smoking and chatting under the portico of tlie court-house, when they were joined by a iong-haired, mild-looking, loug-waisted stranger who seemed just dead witli consumption. He leaned against one of the stone columns, and listened to the talk for a few minutes, and exhibited no great interest until one of the party asserted his belief tliat Garfield would carry Ohio.

" I'll b-bet you a thousand d-dollars against two h-hundred," continued the stranger, as he went down into his coat-tail pocket and fished up an enormous wad of money.

The crowd looked at each other, and then across the street, each man as dumb as a clam. The silence lasted for a miniite and then one of the group reraai'ked:

One or two men pat their hands into their pockets and jingled tiieir keys, but it ended right there. When the silence had grown painful the consumptive asked:

"P-put up your m-money - one t-thousand to two h-hundred that I don't s-s-stutter any more than Any of y-you!" exclaimed the man as he began to untie the string around his roll of bills.

One backed softly into the hall, followed b}' a second and a third, and in a minute the stranger was left alone. Then he untied the string, peeled two one-dollar bills off the roll and put them in his pocket and threw away the "core," which was simply a wad of blank paper. He had blufi'ed the crowd over and over again on exactly two dollars.

The Old Puweer

Among the pioneers may be fouud a peculiar character, who makes himself heard and knuwn everywhere within his adopted county. You may not have encountered him; but every city or village over 25 years old has an " old pioneer." He is an aged man, walks with a cane, has a bent back and scant gray locks, and he is entitled to the unbounded respect of all citizens. Many little privileges are accorded tlie old pioneer. He can open the cheese box in a grocery and help himself, hook apples, reach over for peanuts, have the head of the table when the firemen give a banquet, and if he crawls under the canvas on circus day, none of the circus men strike at him wicli a neck-yoke. And if the old pioneer says that it is going to be a hard winter, a soft winter, a cool summer, or a rainy fall, it would be like one entering a den of lions to rise up and dispute him. He predicts political events, prophesies revolutions, remembers all about how the Freemasons killed John iloi-g-an, and confidentially expects a column notice in the local papers when he drops off. Says one :

" I met one of the old fellows the other day on the cars. He assiireil me that making a journey on the cars was more pleasant tlian riding on horseback, and he said that the country had improved some since lie used to cai-r}- the mail betweeii New York and Cliicago. I was looking right at lum, but he never blushed as he said he used to make the round trip on horseback in live days. I was wondering how he could have done it. when he went on to say that jMewlYork contained only 11 liouses and Chicago only four at the time he acted as mail carrier. I remarked that the mail must have been light in those early days, when he replied: - 'Light! Why, bless you, my son, I never liad less than 14 mail bags, and sometimes as high as 20! I expected to see him struck dead in his seat, but greatly to ui}' surprise he continued to live right on, the same as if he had never told a lie.' ' Ever had any tights witli the Indians in those early days?' I inquired.

"' Injin fiights! I should say I had a few - ha! ha! ha! I wish you could go home with me. I've got seven dry-goods boxes tilled with Injin topnots, seven boxes left, and I've been making horse blankets and door mats out of the pile for tlie last 40 years.' Is it possible?' said I. 'Yes it is; I don't say tliis to brag, but 3'ou asked me a plain question and I answered it. I suppose I killed 11,873 Injuns during my early life, though I won't say that these are the exact figures. It might have been 11,874 or only 11,872. I am getting old and can't remember dates ver}' well.'

" ' Ever see George Washington?' I asked. ' See George Washington? Why he boarded in my family over four years!' - 'He did!' - ' Yes, he did!' - ' When was that?' - 'Let's see! Well, I don't remember just when it was, but it was quite a while ago. Yes, George boarded with me, and I've got a bill of S^iO somewhere against him now. He was a little hard up for cash when he left us.'

"'Did you ever see William PeTin?' - 'Bill Penn! ha! ha! ha! Why I wish I had as many dollars as the number of times Bill and I have slid down hill together! His father lived in part of our house for eight years, and Bill and I were like brothers. I could lick him, and he knew it; but we never even had a cross word between us. Poor Bill! When I read about his being blown upon a steamboat I said to myself that I'd rather lost a brother!'

"'Were you in the Revolutionary war?' - ' Eevolntionary war! TVhy you must take me for a boy! W!iy, I was the first man to jine! There was a week when the patriots didn't have any army but me, and there was so much marching and fighting that I almost got discouraged.'

" ' Then you must have met General LaFayette?' - ' General La- Fay ette! Why, on the morning of the battle of Bunker Hill, Washington, LaFayette, Bill Penn and myself were playing a four-handed game of encher in an old barn just outside Boston. LaFayette was killed jnst as he was dealing the cards!' - 'I thought he returned to die in France?' - ' Xo sir!' - - But history says so!' - ' I don't care a plum for history, young man! Didn't his blood scatter all over me, and wern't his last words addressed to me? I guess I know as much as any history.' - ' What were his last words?' - ' Last words! Well sir, he didn't have time to say much. A cannon ball struck him in the boi.ly. and all he had time to say was, " Don't give up the ship!" - ' Poor Laif!' He was a little conceited, but when he borrowed a dollar, it was certain to come back.'

"'You never saw Christopher Columbus, did you?' - 'Christopher Columbus! Well, no, I never did. My brother used to talk a o-ood deal about Chris, but I never happened to see him. They say he didn't amount to much after all: nsed to get tight on election day, kept a fighting dog and a race horse and was always blowing around what he could do. I was always careful of my character, and they can't say of me that I ever associated with low folks.'

The Terrible Judge

Beebe was peculiarly suited to take a leading part in the life of a new settlement. Extraordinarily given to gossipping and intercourse with his neighbors, he could win a general but not an individual esteem. No one loved him, yet few hated him. He was ever engaged in inspiring petty quarrels and jealousies, and could scarcely rest content at night unless his enterprise in this direction gave birth to some little altercation between neighbors during the foregoing day. When his victims were determined to resist his insinuations at Elkhart, he would actually go to Goshen in search of a new subject, and having satisfied his penchant there

return to his home to lii;d fresh materiah An instance of his desire for a never-ending round of fun is evinced in liis disposition to play practical jokes. One day while riding along the river road, he met one of his neighbors, who was engaged in hauling a hiio-e, hollow log up the river bank. Without any hesitation he says: " Come. Silas! I'll bet a quarter that the hole in that log is not large enougli to creep into." Silas accepted the bet, a, id crept into it. In an instant the judge was off his horse, and giving the log a push, sent it and its occupier rolling into the current. Having done this he rode off in high glee, leaving Silas to sink or swim. Fortunately a few men, passing immediately after this occurrence, heard the screams of Beebe's victim, rescued him from his perilous position, and all vrent en route to interview ihe Judge. He, of course, saw the log roll into the stream and hastened to the town for help. This satisfied the interviewers, and Silas won the quarter.

This tribunal did not approach that of the golden age known as the Secret Tribunal in extensivcnes.«, though it may have equaled it in utility. In the earlier years of the county many good souls - intellectual men - sought a vein through which the blood of pleasantry might course, and among other things formed the " Surrogr.geon," - so named from the fact that one of their number indulged in a lapsus linguce, and in an attempt to name the Surrogate Court, called it the Surrogugeon. It had its faults. Though founded, perhaps, without a thought of its effect upon the moral being of the citizens, it was no less beneficial in its tendency to nip vice in the bud by checking the ])assions of men. Every little social error had to be scrutinized by its officials, and this inquiry was carried out with such a demonstration of legitimacy and authority, that not a few inaoeeat men came before the Bar in obedience to its summons. Whatever means were taken to uphold its authority, or by whatever influence men allowed themselves to be convicted, punished or acquitted by that tribunal is a u\ystery. All the terrors of the law proper surrounded it, all the findings of jurors or judges were made out in regular form, and in factlit only differed from the Circuit Court in the terrible character of its judgments which consigned its gullible victims to life-long-imprisonments for some trifling crime, or periiaps imposed upon them some ridiculous penance, the performance of which on the morrow v.'ould at once amuse atid delight the initiated members of the tribunal. Men feared it; even the incorrioibles grew tame before it, and after it had run its course, and disappeared before the advancing tide of cuteness, many said that the part which it played was highly beueficial, and its existence providential. It is unnecessary to mention even one of the strange indictments made out by the officers of the Surrogugeon; any crime from the larceny of a pin to that of a horse, never escaped its notice; but the great idea of the court was to crush its victim by a terrible cross-examination. After having elicited every tittle of information, in fact a histrobiography of their prisoner, they might order his discharge or send him to jail until his sins would be atoned for. This, in the second quarter of the nineteenth century, seems strange; but the buoyant spirits of the first settlers and the easy-going habits of a few of them account for it, and still leave its menaory green.

Tue I'Kesknt Bar

The le^al fraternity of the present time diiTers in man}' respects from those of by-gone 3'ears. Knowledge, statutes and crime have all grown up together, and tend to entail upon him who would become a member of the legal profession long years of study. Few, in fact none, of the old legal pioneers reside in this county. Mr. Baker, and perhaps a few others, may claim a long and happy connection with the legal interests of the county; but they cannot be considered as belonging to that class of men who made themselves known and welcome everywhere, ignored all the ceremonies which are now in vogue, and only took delight in reducing all law to equity. The following list includes the names of the principal legal gentlemen of the county: - Baker & Mitchell, M. F. Shuey, I. A. Simmons, Vanfleet & Bickel, J. W. Irwin, Geo. W. Best, Osborn & Herr, Wilson & Davis, A. W. Simmons, Delos N. "Weaver, I. N. Hall, Col. Johnson, 0. 11. Main, O. T. Chamberlain, Lew. Wanner, W. L. Stonex, A. H. Johnson, H. Y. Curtis, I. N. Everett, C. C. Gilmore, M. E. Meader, Otis D. Thompson, Livy Chamberlain, Ed. R. Kerstetter, Zook Bros., D. N. Leib, C. F. Shuey, Jas. H. State, M. I. Beck, A. F. Wilden, Milo S. Hascall, H."c. Dodge, Bartholomew & Trimble.