The Climax, 1887-12-07

WIT AND WISDOM Disorder in a drawing room is vul vulgar - gar vulgar in an antiquarys study not the black battle stain on a soldiers face is not vnlgarbut tho dirty face of a house housemaid - maid housemaid is Ruskin Only a Step Nature made tne model ma With perfect form though nude The tailor dressed the fellow up The man was then a dude Whitehall Times Wife onp day after marriage No dear dont give me any money I might lose it Same Wife one j car after marriage I took 20 from your pockctbook last night John N Y Sun Maryland Darky How dy boss How many melons you raised th5s year Gardener About 900 I guess Pete How many have you raised - Darky Forty two sah aside obcr yo fence Burlington Free Press Mrs OHarrity Now put in an another - other another quart Grocer Why didnt you ask for a half gallon at first and liavo done with it Mrs OHarrity Och bless yez sowl One quart is for me self and totlior is for Mrs Casey Back from the Main Wood Bar stow Shot him yourself Jack Train Yaas had tough work with him too Barstow What jjude did you have tills year Train Dirty Johnson Bar stow What does Dirty charge for let letting - ting letting you lio about tin game ho kills this season He was too steep for mo last year Judge We owe it to ourselves to make good use of our endowments and op opportunities - portunities opportunities Tho talents given us are not for ornament much less for waste aud loss but for such employment as we can give them in behalf of worthy objects And what a joy it will be to render a good account of them United Presbyterian In San Sebastian we are informed the people appeared in their old clothes and made no demonstration whatever upon the recent visit of the Queen of Spain But viowed aright the behavior of the populace was very thoughtful and considerate They merely wished to show her majesty that they were at home and wished she was also Smith I say Dumley you have had somo experience in love affairs and I want your advice There Is a pretty little widow in Harlem whom I devotedly love In paying my ad addresses - dresses addresses how often oucht I to call upon her Dumley She is a widow you say Smith Yes Dumley Seven nights in the week my boy with a Wednesday and Saturday matinee Epoch Have you ever noticed that when a crowd of weary excursionists are wait waiting - ing waiting to be conveyed home there is al always - ways always somo man to be found who will stand on tho track by the hour and dil diligently - igently diligently wear out his eye3 looking for the fsin which after all steams into sight from the opposito direction with not a spare seat on board even for the consummate idiot whos been looking for it with patient asininity as remark remarkable - able remarkable as it is not rare Charlestovm Enterprise

DEADLY POISONS Iilfe Defttroylng Substances of Mineral Vegetable and Animal Origin Toisons exist in nature in the mineral vegetable and animal world Arsenic is an instance of tho first strychnine of the second tho virus of certain serpents of the third Those of tho vegetable world arc most numerous and are some of them as violent as any The essential principles of tea and coffee arc poisons and form beautiful crystals Thero are a few including snake poisons that are not used as efficient medicines That physician makes a falso claim who asks for patronage mainly on the ground that his remedies are vegetable There is no doubt that many of the best are of mineral origin The poison of poison oak called also poison sumach the botanical name of which is Rhus Toxicodendron and of poison ivy Rhus Radicans is particu particularly - larly particularly troublesome from the fact that the slightest handling by susceptible persons ignorant of their character say summer boarders from tho city gives rise to a violent burning itching which is sure to be communicated to every part of the body that the sufferer may chance to touch with his affected hand Tho poison oak is a woody shrub that grows to a height of three feet or less the ivy a vine that climbs on stone walls and trees The leaves of both are trifoliate that is they consist of three leaflets common ivy has five It is a sufficient protection to avoid every trifoliate woody plant Many poisons originate In chemical combinations Thus oxygen and nitro nitrogen - gen nitrogen mechanically combined consti constitute - tute constitute tho air we breathe but combined chemically in a certain proportion they form nitrous oxide or laughing gas combined in another proportion nitric acid Fresh meat may be mado poisonous in various ways The animal may have fed on noxious plants or it may have been sick before being slaughtered and the poison may be due to powerful medicines administered or it may hare been affected with a con contagious - tagious contagious disease say pleuro pneumonia Tainted meat also develops chemically a very violent poison German sausages are pre eminent in this respect Youths Companion

fort for trial Ninety five cigar factories have shut down at Havauna owing to the de demand - mand demand ofcigar makirs for an increase in wages A committee appointed by the manufacturers have issued a circu circular - lar circular inviting the operatives to name a committee with a view of conciliating all interests involved About tuelve thousand men are thrown out ol em employment - ployment employment by the shut down No dis turlmuces are feared In the Circuit Court at New Albany Monday when the cases of embezzle embezzlement - ment embezzlement were called agaitiht William Murphy uud Richard Stephens for taking funds collected by them as solicitors of the Metropolitan Manufac Manufacturing - turing Manufacturing Company a plea of insanity was entered in both cases One of the defendants had been an inmate of the Insane liSo pital and it is said the other is insane The outcome of these cases will be watched with interest The Anarchists of Chicago have pre prepared - pared prepared a rabid circular for distribution among the workiiigmeu It is headed with the single word Fight The circular denounces the Anarchists trial and execution and declares noth nothing - ing nothing but force will win It urges prep preparation - aration preparation for the revolution Who Whoever - ever Whoever juins us savs the circular must take all consequences upon himself aud must be ready to sacrifice every everything - thing everything for the cause even sohultl it be his life Mr Bernard public prosecutor lias decided that live persons are to be tried for culpable negligence leading to the destruction or the Opera Comioue by lire and the loss of many lives The prUoners will include the Directors of the theater aud two members of the Fire Brigade The latter are being prosecuted because when within a me meter - ter meter and a half of the precise spot where the fire broke out they tailed to open the hydrant and connect the corres corresponding - ponding corresponding pipes There was placed upon our edito editorial - rial editorial table a box of strawberries picked during the afternoon at the small fruit farm of Messrs Benedict Piokard and

passenger coach without dolug an injury to the passengers or crew The train was running at the rate ot forty miles nu hour at that time and the fly ing piece of tire had the velocity of a cuuuou bttll It sounded like a shell scream as it flew through the coaches The damage to the cars is about 300 Philadelphia Press A Washington special to the daily papers Friday said that Commissioner Miller had ordered the removal ot J P Kandifer or Lancaster Deputy Col Collector - lector Collector the charge being that Mr San difer as uolaiy public certified to the appearance before him personally of A O Burnside when In fact it was R A Burnside Mr Saudifer explains the matter in an interview stating that about a j ear ago A O Burnside went to Texas temporarily anil gave a power of attorney to his brother to act iu his stead during his absence R A Burnside his brother has acted for him and the papers have all been made out iu the name of the absent brother The people of Eastern Kentucky have a great country and a great work to do It Is childish In any one to say that we will go backward Not another backward step We must fight lor deliverances from ignorance aud vice Railroads will bring schools churches and newspapers the educa education - tion education of the people the supremacy of law and order and financial success will follow as naturally as the night follows Iheday When we shall have witnessed the development of this terra incognita and the consequent refinement contentment and happi happiness - ness happiness of its people how proudly we can exclaim These are our moments our trophies our triumphs Three Forks Enterprise An observer down South says an alligators throat is an animated sewer Every thing which lodges In bis open mouth goes down He is a lazy dog and instead of hunting for something to eat he lets hi j victuals hunt for him That is lie lies with his great mouth open apparently dead like the pos-

The Maiden Effort of a Tonn Man on the Light Fantastic A popular young business man con confided - fided confided the detals of an amusing though somewhat delicate situation to a rc portcr the other day and the latter is making a base betrayal of that con confidence - fidence confidence in giving the story to the pub public - lic public but murder will ut It all came of my not having learned to dance lie began You see when I was a kid and the girls my sisters went to dancing school and were brought up in the way they should go I did not care for such tilings and hooted at tho confounded bobbing and twisting and turning which even now seems rather absurd to me 1 volun voluntarily - tarily voluntarily left school rather young and went into business life and have since had neither timo nor inclination fcr dancing As the girls grew older wo had a number of little social hops at the house but I always managed to getaway I never tad any desire to dance nntil the other evening A certain young lady whoso black eyes I had admired from a disttncc for some time was present at one of our little gather gatherings - ings gatherings 1 usually managed to get out of the way when the dancing began but I was so engaged in conversation with her that tho music had struck up be before - fore before I was aware of it I let tho first danco pass without saying any thing but I knew my companion was a fine dancer and very fond of the amuse amusement - ment amusement 1 think that the first danco was an octogette or some thing of that kind for there were eight people in it When that was over the musicians struck a lively jingle which I imagined

of churches and prayer houses is 148 and thero ate three childrens schools with a total of 150 pupils Itulian apolis Journal I hope I has ligion but I doan know 1 hab hearn folks say but I nebber hearn or man say I hopes I has money but I doan know Dat sorter ligion dat yer hopes ycrs got but doan know aint gwinc tcr do yer no mo good tlen dor money what yer hopes 3ers got but doan know Ar kansaio Traveler Some Dartmouth boys most too smart to live surprised President Bartlctt at the senior rhetorical exer exercises - cises exercises in the chapel the other day when all the college students were assem assembled - bled assembled with a jackass which they had hitched to the pulpit When President Bartlett camo to tlio platform he re remarked - marked remarked I perceive some of you have lost your brother and then ordered the exercises to proceed during which the donkey remained tho guest of the occasion Our highest thoughts do not reach what will bo tho level of our happi happiness - ness happiness hereafter At first our everlast everlasting - ing everlasting life will bo like a summers day so calm and beautiful and long But it will prove a day that will last on nnd on and on And when no night comes and when wo do not weary and all things keep brightening about us as the eyes of our understanding open then little by little we shall begin in awe and wonder to feel what it is to be immortal

childrens gifts will be like many a mothers store of relics of her children full of things of no value to others but precious in His eyes for the loves sake that was in them Ftnlon Johns Hopkins University loses 120000 by tho passing of tho Balti Baltimore - more Baltimore and Ohio dividend which it will fortunately bo able to niako up from its reserve fund The city of Baltimore is out 180000 from the same cause and will have to borrow Public Opinion Tho Ragged Sunday schools of London have 40000 scholars and 4000 teachers The president was the late Lord His son succeeds him in the work Tho income of the society consisting of voluntary contri contributions - butions contributions amounts to 80000 per an annum - num annum Public Opinion The colored Baptists of Georgia will celebrate in June 1888 tho centen nary of the founding of their first church January 20 1788 in that State There are as the result of tho centurys work 1400 colored Baptist churches 500 ministers 2000 licenti licentiates - ates licentiates and 1CO0OO members There arc 205 communities of the Greek Church in Japan with six sixteen - teen sixteen priests and 104 native preachers and the number of Japanese converts to that religion is 12500 The number

An Interesting Chamber Tho Supreme Court chamber at Washington was given over to frescoors last summer and was a barren and desolate place enough Dusty whito bags shrouded tho busts of dead-and-gone Chief Justices in tho niches around tho semi circular Tvalls the floors woro bare and the high bench looked cold and lonely Scaffoldings held tho painters to their work up un under - der under the high ceiling In tho gloomy looking clerks desk was locked up tho famous court Bible an Oxford edition of 1799 first used when the court came to Washington in 1800 Since then every President has kissed it at his in inauguration - auguration inauguration and every Chief and Asso Associate - ciate Associate Justice has been sworn in upon it Just to the north of the main cLainber is tho triangular room in which Morso placed his first telegraph instrument and received tho first messago sent ovor tho wire It came from a field station at Bladensburg six miles away N Y Sun