The Tiffin Tribune, 1858-09-10

rT A IUe Viol A small viol lille.: with d ictor'a sluff. TfTThe prrttiest lining for bonnet Is a smiling far. p. jf ?TliO woman who has a had hits- ban I makes a confident of her mind. on a table of goldl iftTSiionk's wifo likes to maVe bread, because she says it cleans her bands so beautifully, JtfTTho pomp and circumstances of a well furnished table covers a multitude of defects, JttT H"nrls Little red things that both men and women play with for mon money. - ey. money. f iTA lite traveler, !n speaking of Aus Austria, - tria, Austria, says that one-half the people are un under - der under arms to keep the other half in goal. it rT-Fishermen must possess extraordi extraordinary - nary extraordinary medical powers, for Ihey novor at attempt - tempt attempt lo cure lish until it is ilea 1. 'lis well, some people say, that man has not a microscopio eye, as his sins woulj staro him too broadly in his face. X0A gill recently stole a pair of gloves, giving as a reason thai she only wishod to gel her hand in. JC'f7It is about as hop-doss, a task to get a rich woman to livo a life of common sense, as il is to get a rich mar. into the kingdom of heaven. if tTlf you are in a hurry, never get be behind - hind behind a couple who are courting. They want to make so much of each other that they wouldn't move quick if thoy were going to a funeral. jT tT.Sonoe a, the famed wrilor upon morals and moderate desires, was said to bo n great usurer, possessing Reven mil lions, r unny to wrlto on moderation up a or a a-doplod - doplod a-doplod of his co cooperation - operation cooperation to any itarWlien Lady Wallace sent a polite note to Mr. Harris, of Convent uitnlon, offering him a comedy for nothing, he ob observed - served observed that her ladyship know the exact value of it. ' -SrWcro hut human beings always that which they are in their host moments, then should we know here already on earth a kingdom of heaven, of boauty and good noss. f0An Irishman remarked to his com companion, - panion, companion, oil seeing H l.idv puss: "Pat, did you ever seo so thin a woman as that, before?" "Thin," replied tho othor; "bothera "botheration, - tion, "botheration, I have seen a woman as thin as two of her put together, I have." iTt-"Do you heliove in Rcoond love, HMinei M tu.,.ki' "Do I believe in second love? Humph, if a man buys a pound of sugar, isn't il sweet? and when it's gone, don't he want aii jlher pound? nnd isn't that sweet, too? Troth, Murphy, I believe iu second lovo." see," said a young lady, "thnt some printers advertise blank declarations for sale; I -wish I could get one," "Why?" nskod tho mother. "Because ma, Mr. G is too modest to ask me to marry him, and p-rhaps if I could fill a bl ink declaration ho would sign It. KeT"'Vn terribly distressed," said a clergyman of indifferent reputation for sincerity to a rough neighbor, "lo near you swear so." "Oh, don't let that distress you," said the neighbor; "1 swear a groat deal, and you pray a great deal, but neither of us means anything by it. JtiT'X quaint writer obsorves, that at seventeen, with refereuco to her beau, a woman inquires, Which is he? At twen twenty, - ty, twenty, grown more ambitious, Who is he? At twonly-livo, tho world having produo- fed its effects, What has by? Bui at thir ty, in despair, Wh.ro is he? Is it true, ladies? XiT"lIov oil are you?" said a magis trate to a German, anaignod before him. "I am dirty." "Ai.d how old is your wife?" "Mine wife is dirty-two." "Then sir, you are a very dirty couple, and I wish to havo nothing furlhor to do with oiiher of you." it'53omo newspaper correspondent a remain asks the question "What is man?" and then answers it in the follow ing somewhat truthful although not very lialtering style: "A thing to waltz with, a thing to Hu t w ith, to take one to places of amusement, to laugh at, to bo married to, to pay one's bills, to keep one com comfortably." - fortably." comfortably." JCifA. man having built a largs house was at a loss what to do with the rubbish. His steward advisad him to have a pit dug largo enough to contain it, "And what," said he, smiling, "shall I do with the earth that I dig up from il?" To which iho steward, with great gravity, re replied, - plied, replied, "llAVB TUB TIT IAHUB EN0DQII TO 1I0I.D ALL." JCiTkn Irish counsellor having lost his cause, which had been tried before throe judges, one of whom was esteemed a very able lawyer, and Ihe two otnors out very indifferent, some of bis brothor barristers were merry on tho occasion. "Well, now," says he, "who could help it, when there were a hundred judges on the bench?" "A hundred judges? There wore but three." "By St. Patrick," re plied he, "there were onb and two cviui- IBS." t iTln one of Caroline Oilman's roman ces, ( library copy ) this passage was mark ed and much thumeu: "There is no object so beautiful to as a conscientious young man 1 watoh him as 1 do a star in heaven." "That's my view eK-aotly'l' sighed Miss Josephino Hoops, as she laid down the volume; "in laot 1 think there is notn in ar so beautiful as a young man. even ha am t conscientious. l

to tho Slaverr existed in Kina nt that timo (the roreal of the Missouri Comrromie ) and still riixts rxnKti tiir coxtitvtiov ok tub United State. James Buchan Buchanan. - an. Buchanan. Resolved, Thai we. have full nnd nhid- in" confidence in the nh'dily, patriotism and elevated purity of diameter of ,Tamn Buchanan, tho present. Chief Magistrate of the United R'ates, nnd in hi wiwdnm and experience, to administer our National af fairs. Democratic Stilt ri t'form. Resolved, Thnt wo accept, the adjust ment of. the 1' Kansas controversr by tho pas'HTft ft" h recent cesjinn of Con Con-?ss - ?ss Con-?ss of Ihn Confi-rence Bill, for the con ditional ndmissirm of Kansas into the Un ion. Dem. Stale rial form. Resolved, That in the future we are op posed to the admission of a new Slato in to the Union, tint il the population thereof shall equal tho ratio for a Representative in Congress. Vcm. Stale riutftrm. I did not consider the mode of snV m'ssion yrovtded. in what ir known as the "English" bill, a fair nubmixsion, and for this simplo reason, nmtu; others: It is provided in effect that, if tho people of Kansas would neeept the L"compton Con dition, that they mit'ht "om in with S.YOOrt inhabitant, but. thai, if they re- looted it in order that, thev mirrht form Constitution agreeable to their own feel feel-tnj; - tnj; feel-tnj; nnd conformable to (heir own princi principles, - ples, principles, that they should not he received to tho Union until ihev had 93,420 inhab inhabitant. - itant. inhabitant. Senator Bovrlas. ''Do you still profess to be Dpmoernt? Do you claim to be the friends of th Ad Administration - ministration Administration ofjimns Buchanan? If you do, and slill persist in following Doiiiflas, then the conclusion is irresistible, you are the most arrant hypocrites that ever trod this 'footstool' on which you dwell." Bureau County (III.) Democrat. "Kansas has voted upon this land prop osition, and refuses to accept the forms offered, and therefore, remains nut of (he Union. This conclusively establishes the fact that Kansas is ul'ra nnti slavery. This heinar tho case, the best, thing for ns is for her to stav out of the Union. Her coming in would only give an accession of stroncr'h to our enemies If shs should stay out forever, all tho bottor." Boyct of S. C. (Jem ) The postponement of the Admission of Kansas into the Union until she obtains the population which a member of Con Congress - gress Congress represents, was to allow the south another chance to win this Teraitory. Democratic Paper. The confidence of the Democracy in Mr Buchanan is slill subsisting and un impaired. Statesman. Let ua stav in the Union as long as we can rulr. Senator Hammond. Resolved, That tho Legislative enact enactments - ments enactments of the last Democratic General As Assembly - sembly Assembly of Ohio wera eminently wise and judicious, and calouh.ted to promolo the best interests of the Sta'o and the pros perity of the pooplo. State riitform. Risolved, That we endorse tho resolu tions of the DomooraUo S.ate Convention,

At the period when Mural was about to invade Sicily, the Chevalier H , paymaster-general of the Neapolitan f, ,r cs was traveling through Calabria for tl purpose ot joining the army, hariti)! been to Naples lo make ..rraiigonviita for the transmission (if siiec e. il- had sent his servant on before 1 i l. to prepare hi quarter at the town of exneetiiiir to arrive there himself si nightfull; but the day being very eultry, he had loitered on the load, and at nine o'clock in the eve evening - ning evening found he was still a considerable distance from the proposed end of his jouriuy. He was so much harassed and itijiii'd that he detormi ,ed to put up for tho night at the first convenient house. Ho at length entered an old romantic building on thu roadsido, inhabited by a man ami his wife, ihe former a stout, mus muscular - cular muscular figure, with a swarthy countenance almost wholly shrouded iu a mask of bushy whiskers and moustache. Ihe traveler was received wilh civility, and. after partaking of a hearty supper, was conducted up an old craiy staircase to his ipartment lor the night. Not much fin fin-nyin - nyin fin-nyin ' the appearance of tho place, and tindir.g no lock on the door, he fixed a ohair against it; and priming h pistols, put lliein carelully under his pillow, lie had not been long in liml when he heard a noiso below, as of persons entering the house, and some tiuio afterward was alarm ed by tho sound ol a man s footstep on tho staircase. 1 lo then perceived a liht under the frovioe of ihe door, against which Ihe host gently pros.od for admit admittance, - tance, admittance, but finding some resistance, he thrust it open Hutlicioutly lo admit hit hand; wilh extreme caution ho removed the chair and entered. With a I imp in ono hand and a huge knife in tho other, he appruuuhed Che bed on tiptoe. The chevalier cocked his pistols beneath thu bod clothes, that the noise of the spring mit'ht not be beard. When the man readied tho side of the bed, he held tho light to the ohevslier's face, who pretended lo be in a profound sleep, bul contrived nevertheless to steal an occasional glanue at his fearful host. The man soon turned from him, and after hanging the lamp on the bedpost, went to the other end of the room aud brought lo the bed-sido a chair, on which he immu diutely mounted, with iho tremendous knife still in bis hand. At the very mo menl that iho chevalier was about to stall up from thu bed and shoot him, tho man in a bin l ied manner cut several enormuus slices from a pioco of bacon that was ban 'Hi'' over his bodstead, thouoli it hud been wholly unnoticed bufore by iho agi talod traveler. Tho host then passoil the i,..t. i. ..i...... i... ........ ' i iii uunrio ins uyer, nrtin, nuu t:l. III. room iu the sumo cautious way iu which ho had eutured il, aud unuouscious of ihe danger lie had eacapt.il, returned to crowd of new and hungry guusli below stairs, who wure, of oourse, not very sor sor-rji - rji sor-rji to perceive that ho had saved his ba bacon - con bacon - Metropolitan.

out the a the and are liv- or of for Kuow Following a Shark. A few days ag a gentleman and one of his sorvanis. a stalwart negro, went fishing on the shore,, about ten miles from this city. Thy ' Cist thoir hooks and linos, and waited for ' a bito. The big darky, after wa ling ou& ' some fe't from the shore, lied tho hue a- : round hie body. His master told hint there was danger in doing so; bul iho sa-' ble fisherman suspected no diiii.-u!1 y or ocident. Soon an old shark, a real old sua dog, came along and awallowed lint til with a good relish, and Sinibo hold the line with a firm grap. The power ful fish however, drew Lnn gradually out into deep water, when, finding that h 1 was in danger of being carried out lo sea, in order to cut the line he nisd-a a d 'per- ate grasp nt his knife, which was fa- laned o his heal half shut, a portion ol his Imir ing bolween iho blade and tho handle; but il was too late. The hungry monster of tho deep, by a rapid moveunuit, slack nod Ihe line and dashed luriously out from shore, followed by tho darky, who alternately disappeared bjneath tin waves, and rose to the surface, grabbing at bis knife as he ru.shed wilh alntysl IL'htning speed iu the wake os1' the bhsik,. He was seen at the distance of nearly a' mile, as he oocusionly rose to the surface; but soon disappeared entirely bar beyond the reach of assistance, and a victim of his owu hazardous daring aud imprudent to inertly . - or folk Argus. RtVALRT. A lawyer having some legal business to traiisnct with a widowed lady. took occasion to iuouiro her n'". fha matron, who had long since doffed her widow's weeds, attempted to look prim and much younger than tha really wa. and rei.'ieu: "Thirty -five years, sir." Then turning to iho daughter, he said; "May 1 be bo bold, luiss, as toenquira your age: "(Jertainiy, sir. 1 am a iuue fvi i'-ir- ly-two, most three years younger loan mother! Guess ,'ma" hadn't looked so flush in. the face for many years precediug this bright disclosure of her daughter. Aud wliHt a home studding enmudl tf-Wondor how many "forged circu circulars" - lars" circulars" the Clique iuicud. to soud cut tlia fall.

A correspondent iu Nebraska says: A few days since wo received a letter from a friend al tho East, making inqui ries, in regar'l lo our Torriiory, from which wo clip the following questions, and append Iho Hiiswcrs: Wo havo been in Nebraska but n short timo, anil our knowledge being gomawhut limited, we hope duo allowance will made lor any mis statements. "What kind of country do you livo in?" Mixed and extensive It is made up principally of laud and water. "What kind of weather?" Long spells of woalher are frequent. Our sunshine comes off principally du during - ring during the daytime. "Have you plenty of wntor, and how golf . A good deal of water scattered about, and generally got in pads aud whisky. "Is it hard?" Rather so, when you have to go a half a mile, and wade in mud knee deep to it. "What kind of buildings?" Allegoric, Ionic, Anu Balorio, Long and Slabs. Tho buildings are chiefly or doors and so low bolween joints that Ihe chimneys all stick out through roof. "What kind of society?" Good, bad, hateful, iudiffereut mixed. "Any Aristocracy?" Nary one. "What do your people do for a living, mostly?" Some work, some laze around; one's shrewd business manager, aud Several drink whisky. "Is it cheap living there?" - Only five cent a glass aud the water thrown in. "Anv taste for music?" Strong. Buzz and buck-saws in daytime, and wolf howling and cat fight ing nights. "Anv nianos there? No, bul we have se eral cow bulls, a tin pan in every family, "Any manufacturers?" Every household. All our children home productions. "What could a tronteol family in mod erate circumstances do there for a iiiL'?" Work, shave notes, fish, hunt steal, if hard pinched, buy and sell town prop erty.

In or nrT hit Ur T ttia Co., llonn Tun. Ticbunk: Will you permit me through the columua cf your valuable pa per, to make a few remarks in regarc this great Western country, My trip this great plnee was, indeed, a tiresome o.ie, as the frcrjuont rains had overflowed nil the streams, making the roads elmost impassable. I loft Iowa City, for this place the first week in August, and was four days and nights in an open WAgon which thoy call a Stage in reaching this placo. Bridges were all gone, and all tho low lands completely inundated with water. Boats ate iu readiness at river banks, and tho passengers and bag bag-gago - gago bag-gago are transferred to tho stago on other side,' which carries you to the next river or creik, and then tho same is performed. Ib many instances tassciigors are compelled to work iu mud and water up. to their knees; (we presume our correspondent meaus ankles. Ed.) I have soen hundreds of emigrants, at river waiting to cross. There are teams stationed at those places to haul wagons across, and men and women as general thing, wado after the wagons. Now is a fact, and Benjamin Tomb, who I the good luck to see, will tell you same. But, regardless of all these hard ships, the road from Iowa City westward, is one complete string of teams; loads goods, emigrants, pedlars and stages, so thick that in many places I have count ed as high as two hundred. It is continual throng of wagons, all destiued for the West. Whon they . reaoh tired and sore, you ask them where are going: "oh, to Ncbrabki, Kansas Utah." Land is cheaper in Iowa now, than has been for years. Persons who want get 4 home cheap, now ts the time them to come. Times are very hard now; money as Bcarce as h.on-toeth.